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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Vanessa Chatelain says
My kids and husband complain when they can see vegetables in their dinner. I usually puree tje veggies before putting them in.
Moiya says
Consistanltly offer the food, Try new flavor additions and texture changes.
Candace carver says
Now there are only 2 things my 3 year will not eat, green beans and mashed potatoes, however I am happy to say after many...many months of putting them on his plate and making him try a bite each time we served either of them we have recently, 2 weeks go, gotten him to devour his green beans :) no luck on the potatoes yet but all in good time!
Deedra says
My best picky eater tip? I really don't have a tip to share. That's why I NEED this book. :-)
Sarah says
My best picky eater advice is to make it fun and keep it light and easy!!!
sherry says
I've read this book and I felt that the author had a lot of good information to share. Let me warn potential readers, the author's own personality quirks distract from the really good stuff she is trying to share. Either her editor strongly disliked her, or she really is a giant, adult sized spoiled brat.Some of the sorts of things she considered socially acceptable are appalling, and not just to the French. She actually admits to fussing, fretting, fuming and even pouting while shopping at the local farmer's market! I will give her this, she was honest!
Jennie says
I make sure that there is one thing they will eat for sure on the plate-and I don't make separate meals...one meal is enough to cook!
Jonell Hudson says
Best picky food tip - Have the older cousin (or other relative) talk about how much they like the food you are trying to get the picky one to eat. My oldest responds best when her older cousin eats something - broccoli, carrots, snow peas - all got there start by seeing her older cousing dig in and eat it!
Alisa Johnson says
"Like!"
Chelsey says
like
Nicole Chevalier says
Like
Chelsey says
Having them pick veggies from the garden really makes them more interested in eating them.
Alisa Johnson says
My cousin visited with his son recently and when presented with a food he wasn't sure about, hesaid to his son that he had to "take a 'no thank you' bite" so that he was at least trying the unfamiliar food. As an adult I'm trying new foods or giving them a second chance now, too, so I am trying to model that it's okay to say (as someone else posted) "I've tasted that and I didn't like it" or "I didn't think I liked it, but now I do."
Nicole Chevalier says
We grow a lot of our greens, and point out to our 2 yr old which ones are okay to eat off the plant. So he's grown up snatching mouthfuls of kale. :-)
Diana Harris says
I have two biggest tricks for picky eaters. First, don't give up. We've been trying to get my son to "like" (not eat but he will eat them but not like them peppers for 1/2 a year. This week, he requested I put peppers in his lunchbox. My second tip is to load up their plate with other items they already like when trying something new.
Sarah says
I don't have any picky eater experiences since my daughter is only 3 months....but one way that my husband and I eat a lot of vegetables is to cook a campfire meal on the stove. I take a lb of ground turkey, sliced onions, carrots, peas, chopped sweet potatoes, broccoli (add broccoli 10 mins before serving) garlic and put it all in a pot. I cover this and cook on low for about 40 minutes. The turkey on the bottom cooks and the veggies get steamed. Usually when we camp we put this in individual foil pockets and throw in the camp fire.
Delisa says
LIKE!
Brianna says
like!!
Robyn Parker says
"like"
Liz Takano says
like
Delisa says
My best picky eater tip is to insist the kids take one bite. If they take a bite and truly can't stomach something, they can always have a sandwich. It works at our house.
Brianna says
My mom always used the "you don't have to like it but you do have to taste it" rule...and when a repeat of something we didn't care for came up, we tasted it again because "your tastebuds grow up just like you, so you might like it this time!"
Also, preparing unpreferred foods differently each time is such a help: brussels sprouts can be steamed, baked and covered with (homemade!) breadcrumbs and (grassfed organic!) cheese, sauteed with a little butter, bacon and sage....
Skimmed this book recently at the bookstore, would LOVE to read it!
Robyn Parker says
I make my kids try everything once every time we eat. At first they hate it but slowly they come around to it! I never cook them anything else!
Liz Takano says
I blend healthy ingedients/veggies into our smoothies to help get extra nutrition as well as gradually help change taste buds :)
Kristen says
Like
Kristen says
My best picky eater tip is just to keep trying! My second child has been quite picky since birth and would never eat soups of any kind. We have just kept trying though and not short order cooking for her. All of sudden, last time we had soup, she went ahead and ate her whole bowlful happily! Persistence definitely pays off.
Sharee says
Like. :)
Morgan Vitart says
"Like"
Morgan Vitart says
Ike
Sharee says
Best picky eater tip - make eating pleasant, offering at least one thing the picker eater will like and making a "thank you" bite a regular consistent rule.
Morgan Vitart says
We have the book "Betty Bunny Loves Chocalate Cake." It is a cute read for picky eaters. Anytime my picky eater won't try something, we refer back to the book.
Jessica B. says
Like :)
Jessica B. says
It sounds simple, but really getting rid of junk in the house makes kids more apt to try new things. Now that the junk is gone, my kids regularly ask for fruits, veggies, nuts, and seeds when they feel hungry. They don't ask me for the junk anymore!
Susan says
LIKE!
Adrienne says
Like!
Laura says
like!
Adrienne says
We joined a CSA and actually volunteered to have the boxes delivered to our house every week. 10 families pick up their veggies and produce at our house. Our kid gets to see other kids get their boxes and gets excited about the farm truck.
Susan says
Kids can't get live on boxed mac and cheese, frozen chicken fingers, frozen fries and frozen pizzas if you never serve them in your home!
Krista Hanna says
Our kids have never been too picky because we eat a variety of foods together as a family and we enjoy trying new things. We also don't let our kids make statements like "That's gross!", instead we talk about how some people have different tastes than others. It's okay to say "I've tasted that and I didn't like it".
Laura says
I use the "you don't have to like it, but you do have to try it" rule. I also refuse to make anything special. Dinner is dinner, breakfast is in the morning. My kids are healthy and happy and certainly not starving :-)