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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Sylvia says
I use encouraging words and have them see my daughter Who is a good eater. I also offer food when they are feeling hungry and don't offer substitutions. Sometimes it works but sometimes it only frustrates me more. Real challenge.
Sylvia says
Like :)
Roberta Thomason says
My friend just read this book and had been telling me about it when I saw it on your website. If two people that I respect tell me it's good, then I need to read it! ;)
Amber Howells says
like
Grazia@ South Main Ave says
Thankfully my son is not always picky, but sometimes he can be. I tell him that he has to try at least one bite. After that he will eat it. Sometimes not. But after introducing the food a couple of times he usually loves it.
Stephanie says
My son has just started eating and so far we have had no problems! On the first day if he doesn't like it I still feed it to him the next day and he seems to eat it! Has also had a variety of textures as I make my own food and he seems ok!
Stephanie says
it wont let me "like"
Amber Howells says
I add shredded veggies to just about everything that I can. When my 1 1/2 yr old asks for a snack I hand her raw veggies...she doesn't really know anything different!
Kari Smith says
Like
Kari Smith says
I have cut out all snacks, save for one (based on what I read in "Bringing up Bebe") and my picky eater has been more open to trying new foods.
Sara says
Let's see...I try to buy only real food and give her the opportunity to taste a particular food more than one way-for instance sweet potatoes, she hates them baked or mashed but likes wedges. I try to provide yummy food in general :)
Tiffany says
"like"
Tiffany says
I did really well with my first daughter. She just ate what we ate- no special meals for her. I remember when she was one we went to a party at a friend's home who are Mexican and Samoan. We knew there would be a lot of ethnic foods that she would not be used to. We did not pack her anything special. She ate what they served. I wish I had been more diligent with my other 3.
Hannah says
Like.
Amanda says
like 100 days
Hannah says
My little is only 2, so not a lot of great picky eater advice - guess the best thing I can think of is ALL foods are dip-able: homemade hummus, yogurt, etc. I personally wouldn't eat some of the combos he does, but as long as it's healthy and he is trying the new stuff, we're all happy.
April Ladner says
Like
Amanda says
I have a lot of veggies out on the counter as I prep dinner. The kids think it's fun to sneak the foods before dinner, and they get lots of veggies in!
Paula says
LIKE
April Ladner says
For my 3 year old, I tell him he has to take 3 bites because he is 3. He usually ends up eating more because he realizes he likes it. Sometimes my husband and I will promise him dessert if he eats a good bit. For my 19 month old, who does not like fruit or most veggies, I just slip in a piece of fruit or veggies hoping he will like them. Most of the time he spits them out, but every now and then it works. I just keep trying at every meal.
Maren says
like
Paula says
If you start young and don't expect them to dislike a food, and you don't act like you don't like it, they like it. We also ascribe to the philosophy, this is our meal, if you don't eat it, you wait until the next meal.
Maren says
Serve something new with something they already like and will eat such as broccoli or other veggies with a favorite dip or sauce. I love green smoothies for this reason. I make the smoothies really yummy with lots of fruit and then add spinach and other greens to them (they still taste mostly of the fruit).
Jenn says
Start EARLY and be consistent with healthy food offerings. And don't give up on a food because they don't like it. Continue offering it every few weeks. Eventually they will probably like it!
Kathleen McHugh says
Like
Gina B says
LIKE!!!
Gina B says
I hate to say it, but a lot of times I trick my 3 picky eaters into trying new food by telling them it's something else. Once they've established that it's not poison, I reveal the true name. It works a lot of the time! They now eat salmon happily (I told them it was chicken), and many vegetables that they previously hated. So I guess white lies are okay sometimes ;)
Jacquie says
Like
linda nunley says
My oldest just plain refuses to eat veggies and I can't blame him since I didn't grow up eating them either. So I am hoping my 19 month old picks up better habits along with our new addition.
Amy H says
Like
DeeAnn says
like
Leslie says
I tell my son, 'one bite.' in the last year he's discovered kale, collards, turnips, beets, and mangos. Didn't like them all but did try them all..
Kathleen McHugh says
2 tips in one!
1) I teach my children to cook wholesome food ...just this week they made whole wheat tortillas and corn tortillas from your website -- they loved them with the refried pinto beans from your website. They love what they prepare and want to learn about all real food that is healthy and wholesome. And...
2) I often do not tell extremely surprise ingredients until dinner is over. For example, last night, I made Tacos deHonga (from NakedCore.com) ...the base for the tacos was mushrooms. If they had known, they might have protested, or claimed to dislike just because the idea freaked them out. They scarfed down those tacos and LOVED them. I didn't even divulge the ingredients until we were on the way to school this morning:)
Jacquie says
I have my kids pick out which veggies they want to try. If they pick a new one by themselves they are more likely to try it. It works well for planting a garden too. If they pick it and help it grow it is theirs and want to eat it. I have a 7 year old that LOVES brussel sprouts now!
Elizabeth Stice says
Like!
DeeAnn says
When I've had to babysit some picky eaters I made them help out in the kitchen to be part of it, they thought it was so much fun that they liked something I never thought they would.
Elizabeth Stice says
The 3 bites minimum (even small) worked really well for us growing up!
carol says
Like
Amy says
Like :)
(I clicked post before but I don't see it. Sorry if this posts twice).
carol says
I try to cut up a lot of veggies and fruits. Then i call my nieces to eat when the not so healthy stuff is still cooking or it is too hot to eat. They then fill up on veggies before lesst healthy choices. I hope to try the fun shapes and food on sticks and other clever ways to make healthy food more appealing,
Amy H says
Start giving kids a variety of foods while they are young...and changes are they will be good eaters as they grow up.
Merry Jo says
Like.