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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Letty says
I like the "one bite" rule... and it has to be a normal bite. There are things I have disliked in the past that I now love!
Lori says
I liked on facebook. Sounds wonderful and am willing to try it out--what will the child think?
Melissa L says
This book sounds right up my alley... We've been telling the kids for years that mom is not a short-order cook and to eat or go hungry (& usually they choose to eat!). Awesome giveaway - thanks!
Maura says
Like!
Christina says
Like!
Christina says
My best picky eater tip is to add a dip of some kind. My kids will eat most anything if they can dip it.
Rose says
My picky eater tip...we make smoothies and frozen smoothies. It's amazing how freezing a healthy item makes it much more appealing. The popsicle effect.
R says
Having only real food in the house helps with picky eaters. If the junk is not there then healthy foods are the only option!! Lisa is right, they eventually come around.
Leslie says
"like"
Lara says
Like!
Maura says
We tell our daughter to try a food she doesn't care for or a new food to see if her "taste buds" came out yet. She tries the food every time.
Leslie says
my kids (3 and 5) know we expect them to take at least one bite of food and if they don't like it we don't force it. My 5 year old has discovered she likes several things she thought she wouldn't like.
Lara says
I've noticed that my kids suddenly get more picky when they are around other kids who are picky, so there's definitely a social aspect to all of this. At home, I've tried to offer a wide variety of foods to my kids from the beginning, and I think this has helped them be open to trying new things. We also tell them constantly that we don't expect them to like everything, but we do expect them to try everything. If it seems fair and reasonable to them, they are more likely to go along with it.
Amy Menzies says
I am a fan on Facebook
laura says
I'm working on my own picky eating to set an example.
Amy Menzies says
I think setting a good example is important.. So even mom & dad should try a bite of everything, even if they don't like it!
Beth says
Try and try again. Just because they don't like it the first time I never stop trying, but the 2nd or 10th :) time they end up liking it.
April says
Like!
April says
I like the idea of making food FUN (especially for picky eaters). Like, naming kale "iron man energy food" or putting yogurt in a fun colored dish, or cutting food out in fun shapes, and finally, kabobs! Kids love anything on a stick!
Lise says
My best strategy for dealing with my very picky eater is to remind myself (over and over) that I was a picky eater when I was growing up, and now I love to eat. I think it's better in the long run not to have struggles over food but to have her see me enjoying mine.
Shannon says
I purée verges and put them in everything......sauces, baking, etc.
Christa says
Like!
Beth says
My strategy when serving controversial foods to my 4 young ones: when I am calm and in control this works 8 out of 10 times... I serve the kids 1 tablespoon of each type of food offered on a very small plate. Literally one tablespoon. Dad and I sit down and act natural, engage the kids in joyful conversation, and miraculously, they are asking for more:) These dinners don't happen as often as I like (I am not always calm and in control:), but when they do, it feels so good and we all really enjoy ourselves.
Jennifer says
I have been reading the book and have been enjoying it thoroughly. Number 9 is the hardest for us. We recently (in the last year) moved to an area That seems to have no clue about the value of real food. I feel like I'm fighting a battle all on my own. Soccer practice, kindergarten tea, all church events it doesn't matter they are ALL offering crap. I don't want to be the mom who constantly has to say no we aren't going to eat that but it is offered so often it's just not a treat anymore. Yesterday
my son was offered juice boxes at two different places, a bag of potato chips, orange crackers of some kind and a white bread hamburger. That was just in one day and it wasn't at the same places. How in the world do we get our kids to say no thank you on there own? Everyone else is eating it. Right now I'm saying no to the kids and serving good quality clean real food at home but we can't stay inside forever. One thing the French have over us for sure is they are all working together. Here it feel like we're fighting a battle alone. Thanks for letting me rant.
Christa says
We are soooo battling this at my house right now. Looks like a great read!
Shannon says
Like!
Bobbie says
Like!!
Bobbie says
I follow the rule of my son eats what we eat. He doesn't have to like it but he has to try everything, and not just once. I've found the more times I serve him something the more recognizable it is and usually around the 5th Time he no longer protests it!
Natasha says
Facebook fan, like!
Sarah says
While I agree about healthy eating and kids (NO ONE is healthier than my parents who raised us on real food and even green smoothies and a raw diet for a while)- but it is NOT government's job! It's the parent's job! Let the parents be the parents and decide. You can help/intervene as a friend/relative. But I HATE it when libs try to steal our freedom to make our own choices like this. And then they try to change our country to mimic European nations. If liberals( and the like) admire these countries so much... PLEASE move there and leave our beloved land to those of us who love it with its promise of liberty and freedom. Sorry for the short novel! :)
Natasha says
Hi! I feel giving the kids more than one choice for fruits and vegetables is key. I make at least two vegetables each night for dinner. The kids have a heaping spoon of their favorite one and only have to eat a very small portion of their least favorite. My kids have also learned if they eat all their least favorites first, the rest of their meal is more enjoyable for everyone.
Angie N says
We have two food rules: If you put it on your plate, you have to eat it; and you must try one bite of everything served. Both of my kids are grown now and there are very few foods that they do not like!
Carrie says
Like!!!
Jessica says
I already like you! :)
Nicole says
Like you on Facebook (although different email used).
Nicole says
I was a picky eater growing up (not sure why as my parents used the principle described above). As I've grown up, I've been more adventurous with my food. I won't say I eat anything now, but at least more variety.
I am with you about leftovers. Such an easy mid-week meal.
Jessica says
Don't make them a separate meal, but always be sure there is at least one part of the meal they will eat. And they have to try one bite of the other things. I've also been making the portion of the "unliked" food that she has to try equal to one bite. It seems less overwhelming to her and she is generally more likely to try it.
Melody @ This Beautiful Frugal Life says
Just liked you on Facebook, how have I not before this???
Deepika says
Using a puree of assorted beans for desserts! Works like a charm:)
Melody @ This Beautiful Frugal Life says
We have worked really hard this year in getting our kids (and entire family) to eat a more balanced, whole foods diet. I totally agree that the world seems against us, not with us! Including grandparents. ;) My best tip is variety, variety, variety. If I want my kids to eat their veggies, I offer at LEAST 2 options for each meal. I have one son who only likes raw veggies and the other likes them only cooked, so I work with that. I don't feel it's being a short order cook when it comes to texture. My husband and I eat a little of both so it all works out. This books sounds amazing, can't wait to read it!