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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
lea says
I agree with all the French rules about children feeding. My kids are so used to snacking and I have been trying to implement three meals a day and snacking only when they are really starving. But still that hasn't gotten far because they would tell me that they are really very hungry when it's hard for me to know for sure. Usually when I'm not hungry, I tend to think that they are not hungry too. All these emphasis on healthy eating and having little social support are making my kids feel lacking and I agree with you that I won't get very far if they have to avoid junk foods because mommy says so. So much of society is either pretending or in denial when it comes to eating habits. Or it's just easier to go with the taste and with the norm.
Stacie says
Facebook like
Stacie says
Our house rule is just that you have to try it, not eat all of it.
Terri says
Like!
Diana says
I don't have any kids but I've grown to like more veg since I've been shopping at the farmer's market and trying new things.
Rachelle Cox says
like
Ann Clepper says
My picky eater discovery - the same food presented a different way can turn a "no" into a "sure". Carrots curls (using a peeler), apple "papers" (using a mandolin slicer), peas still frozen, and anything served with toothpicks.
Rachelle Cox says
I made a rule in my house several years ago regarding snacks. I noticed my kids weren't eating meals they didn't really like and then they would chow down on snacks to make up for it. So the rule is no snacks if you don't eat your meal. You have to wait for the next meal to eat. Trust me, they won't starve.
I also remind my kids that snacks are not meals. They aren't meant to fill you up, just take the edge off until the next meal.
barbara n says
My best picky eater tip....provide fun ways to eat foods that they may not like - dips, spreads and fun shapes
Megan says
I deal with picky eaters by telling them they will take two "gratitude bites." They will take two bites to try it and be thankful that momma took the time to prepare good food for our family.
Kelly says
I believe in being a model for everything we want our children to do. Eating a variety of healthy, delicious foods yourself will show kids that it is a satisfying way to eat. Involving kids with food prep and meal plannin can also help.
Heather says
Liked you on FB!
Heather says
Introduce foods several times and prepare in different ways for children to like them.
Kim says
My best tip is to let the kids pick out a cookbook from the bookstore or library (one with lots of pictures), go through the book with them letting them use colorful flags to mark the pages of the things they would like to try, let them go shopping with you and pick up the ingredients, and then let them help to prepare the meal and set the table. This opened my pickiest eater up to trying and liking things he never did before. Thanks for the chance to win:)
Susan Ruff says
Liked you!!
charlotte media says
Hide the veggies in baked goods, smoothies, and gratins.
Megan M. says
My youngest is two and we have a hard time with her at mealtimes. She would rather eat from our plates than her own despite the fact that she has the exact same thing we do. A lot of times I pick up her plate and pretend I'm going to eat it, and then she's happy to take what she thinks is "my" bite. LOL
Susan Ruff says
I live by the you don't have to like it, but you do have to try it rule!! :)
Erin says
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Erin says
Best picky eater tip: When my 7 year old was younger, we started calling quinoa "baby rice" because it is little, but we use it like we would brown rice. While I'm not a fan of dumbing down things for children, I've found that often when my son rejects a food it is mostly due to it being a complete unknown, but when I compare it to something he knows, he is more apt to try it.
Michelynne says
I have been offering my 3 yr old avocado for what seems like forever, and he would eat it mushed into a homemade falafel, but never straight. Yesterday he was so hungry (dinner came later than we expected) and he devoured almost a whole avocado straight. Things learned: keep offering it, and if they're hungry enough and they've been exposed to it before, they will eat.... :) It was so awesome!
Nicole Gomez says
My son eats all of the foods that most kids don't like. He loves peas, green beans, spinach, but won't eat sweet potatoes. I like to cut things he doesn't like up smaller or grate them and mix it with what he enjoys.
Katherine says
Like!
Jennifer says
if they don't like it the first time, reintroduce it over and over because their taste buds change!
Katherine says
We have everyone try everything at each meal. One bite is fine. My oldest is 9, and it took him that many years to like raw red peppers. You never know when they will decide to like something new!
heather says
we are in a phase where I'll try to have 2 or more veggies (this is our challenge area) and let them choose at least 1 of the two. They seem to be responding well to the choice thing...
Nicole says
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Nicole says
start young---my best eaters are my 2 nad 5 yr olds!
Michelle says
I just encourage the kids to eat healthy, so they can be STRONG!
Whitney says
We don't have that bad of a picky eater yet, but one thing that I think has helped along the way is we started off from the beginning serving him anything and everything avoiding the junk ( sweets desserts til very recently and those are very limited). My son's 2 and he loves salad. I know for sure I didn't eat salad that young.
Krissa says
I'm a fan on FB.
Krissa says
I don't have any great picky eater tricks...and I need some! It's usually such a fight...or bribe them with something they want if they try what they think they don't like.
Zoie says
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Zoie says
Keep trying a new food until it sticks.
Kara S says
Like!
Kara S says
My daugther is a very picky eater. It has been very difficult to get her to eat things like fruits & vegetables. But if she says she doesn't like it or doesn't want to eat it, I make her take a couple of bites. I hope that by trying it several different times on different occassions she will see that she really does like it. I would love to read that book!
Elaina says
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Elaina says
My son is a picky eater. I've been trying to get him to eat vegetables by saying that if he does, he'll be able to drive Lightning McQueen when he gets older. It doesn't always work though.
Karli says
In my husband's family they were required to take a "no thank you bite" of everything that was offered. This is a great way to get everyone to at least taste everything.
Brenda Gonzales says
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