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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Megan says
*like*
Megan says
My daughter's only 15 months old now, but the best thing I can do when she's being picky is give her something interesting to play with in her high chair...then she'll eat almost anything!
Amanda Morris says
Need this for my son. He likes to help me cook, but doesn't even like to try what he helped make. At least my daughter likes most everything and is willing to try new things.
whitney says
Like like
carla says
Like
Stephanie says
My kids will most likely try a new food if they are involved in the process. I'll take them to the produce department and let them choose something they think looks interesting. If I picked it out, they woudn't eat it!
whitney says
When my son was 3 or 4 he wouldn't eat fresh fruit or veggies with his meals, but he would eat them with no problem if I packed them as a snack to eat in the car as we were running errands. The French may not agree, but I was relieved he was finally eating apples and carrots.
Pamela says
This book sounds like it could really help to motivate me in dealing with my picky 3 yr old.
Emily says
Like like like
Emily says
I have my daughter (20mo) help me prepare our food. I learned a while ago, if she's part of the process she's much more interested in eating it. After loving eggs for a while she just stopped eating them, refused to even try. Just recently I had her help me hard boil some and then shell them, she ate 2!
carla says
When our boys were old enough to serve themselves, they had to put at least 1 serving spoonful on their plates, and taste whatever was served at the meal. If they chose not to, mom or dad would dish up and they would have to eat more of it. Usually it was vegetables that were the issue, now they all will eat the "dreaded asparagus, broccoli, squash both summer and winter along with cauliflower.
Lyndsy says
Like!
Lyndsy says
Talk about what healthy food is, what it looks like, what it feels like, how it makes your body feel. Talk abut what makes you strong and smart a d about all of the wonderful things you can fo when you feel strong and smart. Talk about it during meals, at the grocery store, on the car ride home from birthday parties......dtart when they can barely talk themselves and keep talking until you here them one day explaining it to someone else : )
Fawn says
Like
Fawn says
I try to get her to " eat the rainbow". She is 17 now but when we go shopping together I still let her pick out some of her fav fruits and veggies( not many still!) But she has to get them from the color spectrum ( not all yellow/ white) but purples reds oranges greens etc.
Prudence Green says
Like
Prudence Green says
Introduce a food many, many times. Just because a kid/person doesn't like it the first couple of times doesn't mean they won't later.
Kait alwtherine says
I now understand that it is okay to be hungry right before mealtimes. Each time I cook a dish, I dont take no for an answer. I would let my 3 year old taste the food with rice and it always end up a success!
April says
My picky eaters are better at trying something new if they had the opportunity to help make it. They love being able to help in the kitchen and telling daddy what part they did at dinner.
Tracy says
One picky eater tip that I use with my youngest is to use reverse psychology, such as "oh no don't eat, there will be more for me!" This seems to always get her to try something new.
Melissa says
I have a cookbook called "Deceptively Delicious" that basically hides different veggies and fruits in the dish. Now I must confess I haven't used it yet, my kids do pretty good in my opinion for right now, but I will most likely be using that cookbook in the future. Thanks for the book summary it was very enlightening!
Nicole Kennedy says
Like
Holly Hoover says
Would love to read this book...will have to check it out even if I don't win!
Nicole Kennedy says
We try to make a dinner sandwich if my son isn't eating his dinner. Take a piece of each component of a meal and stack them like a mini-sandwich. He thinks it's hysterical and works like a charm just about every time. In fact, I catch him doing it on his own sometimes!
Tracy says
Like :)
Michele says
LIKE!!!
Michele says
best picky eater tip: if your kids don't like something, try fixing it a different way or sneaking it into something! for example, pureed cauliflower in mashed potatoes, or shredded or pureed carrots in with mac 'n cheese!
Sadie says
Just try try again!
Christina says
Games are great at the table and helped us avoid power struggles. Make eating fun!
Ang says
My biggest win came when I shared with my kids what foods I do not care for--salmon, oysters and lima beans. I tried them all in front of the kids and determined that I can cook salmon to my liking but oysters and lima beans are still a challenge!
Joy says
Lead by example. :)
Angela says
Like! :)
Katie Havelda-Dent says
Take it easy on the picky ones! I was such a picky eater and forcing it down my throat led to such stress and anxiety around food. The French would so not approve of that!!! I am a teacher and have found that if you can tell kids a story about food, they'll try anything - teach them! Tell them about the culture the food comes from or the part of America it's grown in.
Angela says
We have a garden and ds#3 (my pickiest) is most interested when he helps maintain and harvest the veggies.
Katie Havelda-Dent says
like
Sara Merritt says
Like!
Sara Merritt says
No distractions is a big one as well as having kids help pick out the veggies and frui.
Valerie says
Like
Angelica Sanguino says
Involve them in the cooking process! My kids love to make fruit pancakes since they get to squish the fruits with their hands and are really excited to try them afterwards.
Valerie says
I'm still trying to figure out what works. I give my kids the pieces of the meal if I know they won't eat it combined. It's a small step.