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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Deanna says
My 18 month old daughter is a great eater, not much she doesn't eat. But she has gone through times were she flips a switch and suddenly doesn't want to eat something she used to love. What's worked for us to to try a little bit again the next week and the next and with everything she's come back around to eating it.
maria says
like
Kim says
When she's hungry before dinner's completely ready, I'll go ahead and put veggies on the table, whether it's the broccoli I already have planned or an impromptu snag of baby carrots.
Deanna says
Like
Molly says
*like*
Molly says
Getting the kids involved in making the meal (going to the grocery store, helping with the pre, etc.) has helped us with having them try lots of new foods.
Jennifer says
One thing that has been working very well with my two daughters, ages 2 & 4, is to model eating healthy foods. We've been cooking a lot more 'real' foods lately and we always put new foods (e.g., quinoa) on their plates, even if I know they probably won't eat it. I make a big deal out of talking about how good my salad and fruits & veggies taste. I ask them to take a bite of foods they 'don't like' - sometimes they do and sometimes they don't. :)
Abby says
Like :)
Abby says
My husband is a really picky eater, but he has gotten better by at least trying different things I make. Just like rule #6 says, he doesn't have to like it, but he has to at least try it. He has found that he likes several things that he NEVER would have thought he would have liked before he tried them :)
Mary says
I try to follow a rule that I read from the website Raising Healthy Eaters. I present a variety of healthy things for my kids to eat at meals. They get to pick what they want to eat. For example: taco night I'll serve tortillas, ground turkey, shredded cheese, diced tomato, lettuce, Greek yogurt (sour cream). The kids can pick what they want to eat. If they want to eat ground turkey and cheese-fine. If they want tortillas, yogurt and tomatoes-fine. All options are fine...they just need to eat!
Timmi says
like
jamie hill says
Like
jamie hill says
Use cookie cutters to cut sandwiches, cheese, etc.
Jackie says
Like!!
Mary-Kate says
LIKE :)
Mary-Kate says
I have four children who all eat differently....the key is consistency, offering the same to everyone, and choices. Also, my son does not like vegetables, but we joined a kids' garden club where he learned to make a salad and dressing...he came home, made it....and ATE it! :) if I had taught him that, it would not have had the same effect as the garden club leader was able to have.
Jackie says
I frequently check out books from the library on the food groups and the importance of eating healthy with my 5 year old. This helps here to see why it's important to eat healthy.
Jeanie says
Like
Jeanie says
I wish I had better picky eater tips. I only have a long list of things I wish I'd done and am trying to change. My biggest regret is letting kids alter the foods we ate. So if we were eating burritos, I'd let my pickiest eater eat a shell with PB in it. Huge mistake. It just should never have been an option.
Lisa says
Like!
I have a little one who pretty much eats everything. Participating in the cooking process since he was little I think has helped. Not making a big deal out of food if he doesn't like it or even when he does. Lots of variety - (he loves sushi with soy sheet) and letting him get nice and messy. We try have a little soup at every meal, he hasn't met one he doesn't like. Makes this mama feel better if he doesn't eat the main course.
Great post!!
Courtney says
Like!
Courtney says
My picky eater turned the corner when we started serving dinner family style. She could eat any combo or amount of food on the table but she could only choose from what was out. She felt control by filling up her plate herself and we were able to limit her to only healthy choices.
Rebekah says
like!
Rebekah says
If I'm feeling the crave to snack, I definitely go for veggies!
Lisa says
Facebook "like"
Lisa says
I think of creative ways to say what food is called. Like we are eating "Pirate Jake's dried plums"... or something a like. Get's them every time, because they like the idea that their favorite cartoon character "eats" the same thing they do and likes it.
Amy Sell says
I try to find a recipe that the kids find more appealing with a particular food or vegetable, then after I find one they like they are more willing to try that food again in something else that might be a little more adventerous.
Melissa says
I follow you on Facebook. Like!
Kristin says
"Like!!!"
Melissa says
Dont force the kids to eat anything. I just keep putting good foods out and offering them healthy foods at meal times and set a good example by eating the healthy food myself. Eventually my kids have come around to liking most foods I serve.
Diane says
I follow you on Facebook, "like"
Shelly says
Like!
Sheri Secules says
"Like"
Sheri Secules says
My best tip is no snacking between meals. It really does help with eating the food that is made for dinner.
Diane says
When my kids were little I used to make sure to give them veggies while they waited for their supper. Sometimes they even liked to eat frozen peas better than cooked ones.
Shelly says
We have a rule of no second helpings until all 1st helping portions are gone. For new foods or "yucky" foods, she gets a small "no thank you" helping.
Diana says
I give them their whole meal on a plate at once. It usually includes something I know they will eat, and something that is a stretch. If they want seconds of anything, they have to finish what's one their plate first. That way they always get something, but have an incentive to eat the other thing.
Mandy says
like!
Mandy says
I'm lucky and I don't really have a picky eater, my daughter will eat anything! So I really don't have any tips, but I love to read about them so one day in case I need them I am prepared!
Erin says
I have been blessed with children and a husband who like food. Some of the things I have done is used colored sugar when I make cinnamon and sugar toast. It's simple and easy, plus with the color it shows up so I think we end up using less. My five year old won't eat zucchini and yellow squash, at least in pieces but she will eat it grated into things. I use the fine grating side on the grater and put it into almost everything, and she never notices. We also all sit down and get everyone involved in making a menu plan. That way she has a say, dad has a say, and it helps mommy be less stressed too, which makes for a more pleasant meal time all around.