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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Brittney says
My youngest is two and very picky, but I noticed that if she is in control of what she eats then she is more likely to eat it. We had a garden this year and she loves picking peas, carrots, strawberries and currents out of it to eat and it's a great way to get her veggies in without me forcing them on her. Also, she loves to help me "cook" in the kitchen and taste the things we are making. Lastly, I refuse to have junk food in the house so if she asks for something snacky and we don't have it, then she has no other choice but to choose something else. I'll even let her look in the cupboards to prove I'm not lying to her!
Jen Campbell says
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Jen Campbell says
I let my girlie pick what she'd like to eat, help cook it, and of all else fails choose what to sprinkle on top (parm, nut. yeast, or even seasonal cupcake sprinkles (we're using halloween sprinkles in our berry oatmeal))
Maria L. Caraballo says
we sing in our house..thanks to yo gabba gabba we sing theres a party in my tummy to get them to eat and try different foods. it has worked!
Michelle says
Try and try again... and start when they are young!
Aragorn Batsford says
Picking food seems to work. Either from your own garden or go to a pick your own farm.
Dawn Kaestner says
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Dawn Kaestner says
I'm not a believer in sneaking veggies into dishes or tricking kids into eating it. Have only the good stuff in your pantry and serve real food at meals. When they get hungry enough children WILL eat. They may make faces while doing it but I can deal with that:)
Michelle says
I agree Dawn! The whole point is to get them to enjoy veggies as real food! I am pretty sure spinach has no nutritional value once it is pureed and baked into brownies, lol :)
Kate says
My kids really like to help in the kitchen especially preparing the meal. This gives them buy-in and they're more likely to eat it.
Amanda Rivera says
We are really new to the whole feeding-a-child thing, but we are finding that if we are enthusiastic about the food, he is too!
maria leeker says
Like
Jennifer P. says
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maryanne says
My son is down to a few foods that he will eat. He loves rice and that is his main staple. I have never made separate meals for my kids and we sit down together as a family every night for dinner. I could use some inspiration to help get through this difficult phase!
maria leeker says
I'm not sure I have any tips! That's why I want this book! I guess, if anything, would be not to eat so much processed or pre-packaged foods.
Jennifer P. says
Grow a garden! Kids love to help out and it's a great learning experience for them to see the growing process from seed to plant to flower to vegetable (or fruit)... and then they're more willing to taste what they helped plant and grow!
Meredith says
Like - but I can't resist sharing one more.
I hate being the bad guy, fighting with my kids over every bite. So we use a set of dinner dice. After the first bite, (You don't have to like it. You do have to try it. ) my kiddos can roll the dinner dice. Our are a large set of foam dice from a gum ball machine. They roll the die/dice to determine how many more bites they have to take. They might get lucky with a 2, or they could roll a 12 - either way it's not my fault! In our house you are only allowed to roll once or else they get added together.
Lauren says
"Like"
Lauren says
With my girls I have found the tip that works best is from "French Kids Eat Everything". For example, I made some berry yogurt sauce for pancakes yesterday. My 4 year old barely tasted it and decided she didn't like it. But, after I told her cheerfully "that's okay, I bet you'll like it when you're older" she tried it again within minutes, declaring she loved it!
My second picky eater tip is that I don't force food. But, if our kids don't eat at mealtime they get offered the same plate of food that has been covered and put in the fridge. It's amazing how much stress this takes away. I know that if they truly are hungry they have food available, and dinnertime is no longer a battlefield.
Jen says
We have a rule that everyone has to try it once, sometimes it works! Also, we as the parents try to set a good example for our kids and what they should be eating. I've also heard that allowing kids to help themselves from serving plates on the table helps them to eat better and try more things.
Meredith says
Lose the fork & spoon! Let them eat dinner with chopsticks, cocktail tooth picks (my son loves the pirate sword ones), fondue forks, etc. Sometimes a simple change makes all the difference.
Cristina @ An Organic Wife says
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Cristina @ An Organic Wife says
My best picky eater tip: Mix it. After 3 years, I still cannot get my husband to eat whole wheat anything. If I mix some soft white whole wheat with white flour, I can usually get away with it. Something is better than nothing.
Doug White says
sometimes giving the child a "fun" utensil like chopsscoopticks or an ice cream scoop will distract them enough to eat the food.
Tina says
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Tina says
It helps to have them help make the meal.
Heidi says
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Heidi says
I have a three-year old daughter and she eats what we eat. Although she goes through spells where her tastes and favorites change (sometimes frequently), I avoid calling her picky as that sounds like an excuse. If she doesn't want to eat something on her plate, we tell her that's fine, but we always urge her to try new things and remind her she can't say she doesn't like something if she hasn't tried it. I know if she is hungry, she will eat - no child would intentionally starve. If we are trying something new or something she hasn't yet warmed upto, I make sure I am also serving something I know she does like. I have found that it takes her a few tries to warm up to most new things. I just keep making it, offering and encouraging it, and eventually it grows on her. She loves a homemade cookie as much as the next kid, but we remind her they are a treat and that her body needs healthy food for nourishment so that she can grow and play.
Sara says
My daughter is a fairly good eater - but, my best tip is to model what you'd like your children to eat. If I eat my veggies, then my daughter will eat them too. If I snack on carrots sticks for our afternoon snack, so will my daughter.
Bethany says
For my pickiest eater, I cram as much nutrition as I can into each bite. Everything that I can hide in a food I do. Cooking from scratch gives me the option to add a plethora of fruits and vegetables to every dish. Eventually, he'll outgrow this, but in the meantime, I make sure he has plenty of unknown exposure to a food. Its paying off too, as he realized that he likes broccoli once he saw it being processed for a favorite dish. I don't hide the fact that I add a lot of vegetables and fruits to our meals, I just don't make them a main feature on the plate.
Marina says
Fruit as dessert.
Sharon says
Liked
Sharon says
We as parents show my kids by examples. if I want them to eat certain food, I usually eat it in front of them and telling them how good it tastes. They usually will want to try and end up liking it too.
Sarah T says
Like!
Ashley says
I have a 2 year old and a 4 year old. My 2 year old eats just about anything, because we have never opted to make him anything else when we have a meal. We made that mistake with our oldest. Since then we have made sure he is part of the whole food buying a prep. He gets to help me pick out meals that we have arranged in a meal binder and then gets to wear a child's chef's hat while we make dinner. It takes a lot of patience... esp. when they squeeze an egg in their hands and it paints your kitchen. They are learning to love the process and love food. We have also started planting our own garden. It takes forever to let them help you plant everything, but it is a great learning tool, and some of the best bonding time ever. Also, having your own good eating habits is so important. Don't feed them some steamed veggies and then sit down with a bowl of lucky charms. We had a friend over for dinner last evening and our 4 year old came in and asked for an apple as a pre dinner snack. The guest looked so confused and made the comment, "I don't think I EVER asked my mother for an apple as a snack. I still wouldn't. That is awesome."
Sarah T says
There have been a few foods my one year old doesn't seem to like, but we just keep trying. Eventually he changes his mind. I'm not going to give up after just one try!
Dawn says
We just found out my son has multiple food sensitivities which explains his picky eating. But in the meantime, if he is involved with growing or cooking the food he's more likely to try it. I also use a the "you have to eat you carrots before you get..." tactic. It works and I'll do what it takes.
Erin says
I make spinach and fruit smoothies every morning for breakfast. My one year old LOVES them!
caryn says
like!
caryn says
my biggest advice is to let the kids help with planning the menu and preparing food! if they are able to choose one dinner per week and help in the preparations of food throughout the week, there is little that they won't try.
Sarah says
Like.