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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Kylie says
I have to agree with some of the other posters - you have to let your kids know that not all food is for enjoyment. Serve real foods and healthy foods and make sure your children are eating for nourishment - not emotionally filling a void or in celebration. It is great to have treats; however, not every celebration and holiday should be focused around eating, turn it around and make it about being with friends and family!
Dani V says
"like"
Lauren A. Johnston says
Like.
Kylie says
I run a daycare and have a relatively picky husband and I find that the best way to incorporate new foods or foods that my kids don't like is to serve them with foods that they do enjoy. I also only serve one new food at a time and make sure that they take at least one bite (and swallow it, no spitting it out). I find that having the kids help cook, grow and pick out the new foods that they tend to be more excited to try the new food.
Lauren A. Johnston says
My Picky eater tip is letting kids be hungry. They don't have to eat what I cook but they can't substitute junk for a healthy meal.
Dani V says
I sneak pureed veggies into soups, fruit into salads (then I sneak in other brightly colored veggies) and of course, cauliflower mashed potatoes!
Crystal says
Eating at the table has really helped my 18 month old. For a long time, we got used to feeding our daughter alone (with the tv on and everything) then eating our meal after her bedtime. Since we've begun eating together at the table away from all the noise, we feel much more relaxed. The happier environment makes her happy to sit for a longer time and the longer she sits, the more veggies she eats.
Elizabeth says
"Like"
Elizabeth says
I'm not sure I have a tip. I have tried lots of things - kid cookbooks, letting them help make dinner, getting them to eat one bite, trying to make the food "look" fun. I guess my one thing is to put chocolate in it! Chocolate chip pancakes, chocolate chip waffles, chocolate chip banana bread...you get the idea!
Denise G says
Like!
I tell my kids that it takes several tries to like new foods and taste buds change over time, so they need to taste everything put in front of them. Just one taste. They have now each discovered healthy foods they like, and they've influenced each other as well.
Denise G says
I tell my oldest son it's my job to teach him to make good decisions, and then the decisions are up to him. He's making better food choices now.
amanda says
We like you on facebook
amanda says
We have found that if we let our kids help prepare the food, they are more likely to try it. We even find little things that our 20 month old can do. We also found that including the kids on the food selection for a meal helps.
Dessa C. says
like
Dessa C. says
Serve several different vegetables and let the children choose 1 or 2 of the selections. That way they are picking what they eat and if they really don't like something there are some other choices for them.
Amanda T. says
We make our daughter at least try one bite.
Jessica says
"like"!
Jessica says
I've got the pickiest 4 year old! Maybe this book could help?
My picky eater tip so far is that mom and dad have to set a good and clear example in the content and the portion size of their meal. And in their reviews. If dad says mom's cooking is gross why would Junior want to try it?
Valerie says
Like!
Valerie says
I've heard great things about this book! My best picky eater tip is the rule that they have to try 1 bite. If they don't like it, that's okay, but they have to try it first. Many times, they find out that it's actually good!
jess jk says
LIKE :)
jess jk says
You have to try at least one bite of a food you don't like every time we serve it. And if you want seconds of something else on your plate, you had better take more than one bite of that unliked food.
Twana R. says
Like
Twana R. says
Educating my 8 and 10 year old daughters about what is in the processed foods they want to eat has worked wonders. They read packages and they pay attention to whether or not they have colors outside of white and brown on their plate.
Carol says
I like you on Facebook!
Carol says
The biggest success with my picky eater is consistency and patience. It's amazing how my daughter will dislike everything I put in front of her only to start liking it after trying it many many times!
Caroline says
Like!
Marla says
Older kids start learning things in school and from their peers, use that to your advantage. When the kids come home wanting a protein drink to build musclestart them looking at food labels and learning what already has protein in it.
Caroline says
I know what has helped my picky eaters is when they get to "help out" with preparing the meal. I also have them try things more than once to keep exposing them to new veggies, fruit etc.
christy says
I LOVE this book and would love my own copy. My biggest takeaway was the snacking. We weren't big snack people (i thought) but I realized that even though we didn't snack as much as others, it interfered with mealtimes. According to the book the average american kids gets 3-6 snacks A DAY!!!! Just because you stop for gas does not mean everyone in the car has to have a snack and a drink. We were going to 1st grade this year and so had to eliminate morning snack anyway, so all summer we had no morning snack and only one afternoon one (we eat dinner late). Also, following rule 6 I still dish up the 6 year old's first plate so she has to try everything before havign more. Extreme drama (crying, noises, faces) means dinner is done. Finally going to a coop garden and actually picking it makes it so much more attractive to eat, as well as participating in the preparing of the dish.
Dulcie says
My husband is the pickiest eater! I have to sneak ingredients in meals all the time. For example salmon in our "tuna" patties.
Kathy Damron says
I "like" on Facebook! :)
Kathy Damron says
My best picky eater tip is VARIETY! And, having him try everything more than once. I tell him he doesn't have to like it but he must try it a few times and he just might end up liking it!
Jessica A says
Liked on FB!
Alexandra says
My best picky eater tip is to stick with it and not give in. I made my son's baby food and when we got to beets he refused to eat them. I had spent a long time (and messy time) preparing a large quantity of pureed beets for our freezer, so I was determined we were going to use them all up. I kept giving him some everyday to try and mixed them with other baby foods he liked. After about 1.5-2 weeks, he got to the point he would eat them and not refuse them! I kept thinking that if I had not stuck with it that he never would have gotten over his initial dislike and eaten them.
Kristen says
I am also a FB fan! Your website is exactly what I've been looking for! thanks to a friend who "shared" your taco seasoning post.
Kristen says
My kids LIVE for snacks so if they really want one b/f bedtime, then dinner MUST be ate. It also seems if they help prepare it, then they're more likely to eat it!
Jessica A says
My best picky eater tip is to tell your kids that the food you are trying to get them to eat is your own favorite food (eat it in front of them and tell them how good it tastes). Eventually they will try it and probably like it.
Breanne says
When my young kids wander into the kitchen while I'm cooking dinner, I give them LOTS of bites of the raw ingredients (other than meat, lol) to try. This seems to make them more enthusiastic to try the finished product. And the worst thing that happens is that they fill their bellies on bites of healthy ingredients :)
JIll says
like!