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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Angela says
I try and offer healthy choices--my kids get to pick which veggie they would like, but they know they have to eat healthy veggies. Another thing that has helped is to put spinach or zucchini in their smoothies. They know it's in there, and they think it's cool!
Lee says
I limit the amount of juice or milk between and with meals. My kids would rather fill up on these drinks rather than eat their least favourite foods in meals.
Caryn says
I sneak spinach or black beans into brownies.
kirsten says
My best advice is something already mentioned above. I refer to it as the one bite rule. My oldest is picky and she knows she has to have at least one bite of everything.
Jill S. says
Like!
Jill S. says
One of our tips to encourage our daughter to try new foods, starting from when she was a toddler, was the "one bite rule." She couldn't just say she didn't like and wouldn't eat a food, especially if she'd never eaten it. The rule was that she had to take at least one bite first.
Ashley b says
I have 3 girls that will eat pretty much anything (not trying to brag but this is probably the one area in my life I feel successful). I really contribute this to teaching them healthy eating habits beginning at their very first meal. I think making your own baby food and exposing them to many different flavors early in life saves a lot of work later on when they are more likely to become picky (not to mention it is way cheaper then buying babyfood!). Also to keep in mind they are following your eating example. At 7, 5 and 21 months our girls know they eat what the adults do or they don't eat. Definitely avoid processed foods. Let your kids help with the menu planning and shopping list. They love to be able to pick a healthy meal for our weeks menu. Things like dessert and organic mac'n'cheese with veggies is a special treat. I am fortunate to stay at home so I can prepare most meals but if we have a busy week ahead our whole family will help prepare as much as we can for the following week so we don't panic with what to eat around meal time. We are also on a very limited single in-come budget so I plan our meals around the weekly ad from my favorite health food store and try to buy organic when cost effective. Hope this can be helpful to someone.
Claudia B says
like :)
Claudia B says
My two-year old has his fussy days and then days when he'll gobble up everything. I don't stress on the days he doesn't feel like eating as much (to a point), because if he's truly hungry, he'll eat and won't starve himself.
Karin Gregory Jones says
My tip is get the kids involved with the actually shopping and cooking of the food!!
Jill Susanne says
I once heard a quote, "Never negotiate with terrorists or 3 year olds." LOL :) Isn't that true at dinner time?!?
Susan B says
*like*
Susan B says
I sneak extra veggies into Prego and other things like meatloaf.
Tabitha says
Like :)
Tabitha says
I make a green smoothie with spinach, kale, carrots, you name it. Mix it with some milk and berries, chia seeds, and flax seeds. My toddler thinks it's the best thing ever!
Hemma says
Like
Hemma says
We eat as a family and although dinner is most certainly what is on the table I do usually include an item that my son will like so he is not put off by the entire meal. He doesn't have to clean his plate, but does have to at least taste item he "doesn't like." If he flat out refuses it he does not get the treat we get, which could be anything from strawberries to a piece of dark chocolate. He loves dessert so it is usually a good motivator. I also leave the plate on the table. We have heard him sneak out of his room after we had all gone to bed clean the plate he previously wouldn't touch. It is mostly about control. Once he was over trying to be in charge he realized he was hungry and that he was going to eat that or nothing. When mealtime is run by you and they know it.
kelly anne says
Like
kelly says
1 bite rule for new foods and usually never anything new that may be challengeing as the main dish!
Mary says
It's not that those who work in school cafeterias don't want to cook healthier food our hands are tied by our employers. Cafeterias are not supported by the general fund. Parents need to tell the school boards to support them. Then we can cook / prep and serve heathy food. When the Feds only reimburse a school $2.77 for each free meal and out of that your salaries, food cost and in some districts you facility use charge. There's not much left for quality meals. Get active at board meeting start voicing your concerns. Most cafeteria staff only work a 2-3.5 hour day. More time better meals
kendra says
My son isn't super picky - but he does refuse to try new veggies sometimes, I just tell him he has to try it before he can leave the table. If he doesn't like it he's allowed to spit it out - but I've gotten him to eat brocolli (which was a huge - "I don't like that!") and we're moving on to red and green peppers with ranch - it's christmas season after all! ;)
Katrina says
My 3-year-old boy does not like eating fruits or vegetables. I get him to drink them in a "Green Hulk Smoothie," which includes lots of spinach, a couple of fruits, milk, and/or yogurt.
Lindsey @ Family Food Finds says
Like! :)
Lindsey @ Family Food Finds says
I only make one meal. The kids eat what I make, and that's it. I offer a healthy main dish and at least one vegetable side ( I love a variety of colors!). We always eat at the table as a family and they often get distracted in conversation. :)
Tiffany Perry says
"like"
Tiffany Perry says
I have learned to just leave the food sitting in front of my picky guy and he usually tries at least a bite or two. Our other problem is his food allergies, so he usually has to eat a different dinner than the adults anyway, but he doesn't mind.
Kimberly Silva says
Like
Kimberly Silva says
To get my little ones to eat I don't make extra foods and I try to get them to eat a bite of everything. Most of the time they will like it if they try it.
Lauren says
To get my picky little ones to eat, we would always "share" their food with The Wiggles. We'd pretend they were sitting at the table with us and we'd go around giving everyone a "bite" and take bites ourselves. Before we knew it, everyone, including The Wiggles ;), would have full bellies and clean plates!
Dominique says
When I see my kids don't like something that I cooked, for example beans, I make beans more often. That is my best tip and really works. I turned my picky 4 years old in an excellent eater that ask for more veggies. At home we don't eat processed food. We stay away from GMOs. I am european.
Nancy says
When Andrew wouldn't eat what was prepared, his plate was saved to be heated when he decided he was hungry. Now he eats everything.
Robyn says
I have been food training my daughter since she way first eating solid foods. I've notice that she simply just dosent have a taste for processed foods. I like to make her a part of the preparation of food so she excited to eat it and feel a part of the process. When it's time to go out to dinner I choose places that have whole good foods. Mediterranean food is our family favorite and is made fresh. She's never had a happy meal but recently a family member offered her some of that food. She spit it out and said gross. I know there will come a time when she's faced with more of these foods but I hope to give her the tools to make the right choices.
Elizabeth says
I wish I had a tip to leave. I argued for an hour over a songle lima bean with my daughter...she never ate it :(
jess says
For my son, we did a chicken dance where the adults took turns walking around like a crazy chicken for each bite he would try. He loved the dance and loved laughing at us as we looked like total fools. Luckily we don't have to that any more and he loves chicken. For my daughter, we just tell her "remember, you love xyz" and she replies with "oh yeah!" and eats it all up (most of the time).
amanda says
oh man, I need this book!
so far i've had luck when my kid gets to help prep the meal - especially chopping vegetables or something that is an important job. he has tried new things occasionally when he has helped cut them up.
Catherine says
We let them help with food preparation, and help them plant a small garden of their own
Rosie Martinson says
We alwayshave a rule called an " adventure bite," and my 6 yr old realized that he does in fact like tomatoes! I hope I win-I really want this book!
sheri secules says
I have the child take the number of bites of a food they don't 'like' by their age. If it's the 2 year old they must take at least 2 bites, the four year old must take 4 bites before they decide if they will eat the rest or not.
Maryanne says
i disguise the food (puree) but make sure to point out what they are eating after they taste it. "you are eating broccoli if you didn't notice, not so bad eh?" Next time less disguise is needed until they are eating the offending food in it's whole form.
Alejandra Nann says
After months of begging Niko (my son, 2 years old) to eat, I gave up. I just served him dinner on the same plate as I would use for my husband and I and I didn't make a big deal about it. Next thing I knew, he was eating! The more attention I give him about eating his dinner, the less he will eat. So far, so good :)