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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Bonnie says
Like
Cori says
like on FB
Bonnie says
Patience, patience and more patience!
Kimberly says
like
Kimberly says
My best picky eater tip is if you don't eat what was served at dinner, you will not eat again until breakfast. Picky kids drive me insane.
Cori says
I have always just continued to offer things when my daughter hasn't liked them and often times she is willing to eat something she refused at lunch for dinner.
Katie says
My best results with my picky eater have come from talking with her at mealtimes about the vitamins that are in the various foods she is being offered and how they affect our bodies (e.g., protein helps build strong muscles) and how important each one is. I started talking with her this way from about the age of 3 and she has been expanding her palate since about 3 1/2.
Colleen Grossner says
Ha! I can't wait to read through everybody's tips!!! Here was a fun one about FOOD Attitude for Picky Eaters!
Even though my 3YO daughter was fussing irrationally that she did not want this dish, she LOVED it! She even went on and on, explaining how very much she was LOVING EVERY part of the dish -- even the green leaf parts! HOW?
When she was all upset while I was making dinner, I talked to her about considering the fact that the meal MIGHT ACTUALLY be yummy. I asked her if she usually, or even sometimes, likes foods that I cook. She said yes. That was about it, but really just talking about another PERSPECTIVE changed her ATTITUDE for when she actually tried the meal a little later. I had also said she could just try it and see. Letting her know that if she doesn't like it, she won't have to eat it all up, just some, made her feel independent, in control. Turns out she had SECONDS! It was a penne Italiana (http://fresh-you.blogspot.com/2012/03/youre-gonna-wanna-this-penne-italiana.html) :) And here are some other picky eater TIPS AND TRICKS :) http://fresh-you.blogspot.com/2012/01/8-trickstips-for-picky-eaters.html Happy eating everybody!!!
I have heard of this book, but hadn't read it, maybe I'll win! Thank, Lisa!
Stacie says
Like :)
Julia says
Like
Syhren says
I have wanted to read this book for awhile!
Stacie says
We use a "No thank you" bite. You must try everything, after the first bite, you need to take another, and then you may say no thank you. This has worked with our child because sometimes the first bite can be a mental block, and the second bite she will actually taste what is being offered.
Julia says
Blend as early as you can. Mixing flavors for babies when making homemade baby food teaches them about complex flavors early.
Cindy says
Like.
Michelle says
I sneak spinach in smoothies. My older son likes raw veggies over cooked so that's what he gets!
Katie says
Like!
Amanda Huff says
Like
Cindy says
I find kids aren't picky when all of the junk is cut out of their diet. Pretty much as the article had said.
Janet Yunker says
My 3 year old's favorite book is "Green Eggs and Ham" so when she is hesitant to try new foods we remind her that after he finally tried the green eggs and ham, he liked it! It at least helps with the first bite!
Amanda Huff says
My son often helps me make dinner. He is a very picky eater and this hasn't seemed to help very much, but he enjoys it so much. I have learned that he especially loves breadmaking.
Karen Szypulski says
Like!
Devi says
Like!
Ellen Berlgund says
My pickiest eater is much more motivated to try something he's made himself. I let him know what ingredients I've used for dinner, and are thus available at dinner, and he assembles his own plate and eats more than if I served him the same thing.
Sandy says
Like!!
Sandy says
If I serve something my son doesn't seem interested in eating, I will mix it with something else he does like and most of the time, he will finish it.
Karen Szypulski says
My picky eater will try most foods if he can dip it in either ketchup or ranch dressing. He eventually grows to like some of the foods without the dip.
Lynn says
Like :-)
Lanie says
LiKe!
Kerrie says
Like
Kaarin Puhala says
like
Kaarin Puhala says
Tip: Keep offering the same food over and over by presenting it on the table. Your child will see you eat and enjoy it. It may take a year, but one day, he/she will actually try it and like it!
Kerrie says
I follow the "not a short order chef" rule. Plus I always make sure there is a selection of fresh organic fruit.
Lynn says
Our son is pickier than our daughter, so I always put veggies etc on his plate and have him eat the number of bites for his age--he actually realizes that he likes more than he thought--today he said he loved squash!! :-)
Kara says
I like you on Facebook!
Devi says
If our kids don't like a food, we have them eat as many bites as their age. So our five year old, has to have five and our eight year old has to have eight. We tell them they do this because as they get bigger they need more nutrients to help them grow and our nutrients comes from our food. We started doing this when our oldest was two or so and it sort of stuck. We now VERY rarely have to tell her to eat eight bites and our five year old is progressing along the same rate as she did and likes more foods every month.
Sarah H says
I personally love the sneaky veggie purée method, and my favorite of all time is mac and "cheese." I sauté onion, carrots, celery, garlic and any other veggies I have on hand - a few tomatoes, a summer squash - then purée those to mix in a bechamel cheese sauce (very simple, 3 tbsp flour mixed with 3 tbsp butter over medium heat, then add milk, then the purée, last mix in the cheese off the heat). Served over vegetable noodles or whole-wheat noodles and baked in the oven, the sauce is smooth and even orange-colored from the carrots - orange enough to rival a box of mac and cheese. It's so delicious and my picky toddler chows it down. Plus I get comfort food to rival the best! And it's a fun recipe to make with the little ones, there are lots of great tasting and mixing opportunities!
Sandy says
I am so thrilled to have found 100 Days...I am new to it, but thankful to have a place to learn about healthier eating habits. Thank you for what you do!!
Kara says
Encouraging everyone to pitch in definitely helps!
Lanie says
I eat the undesired food first (or we go around the table and have everyone take a bite), then tell the picky eater to try a bite. If that doesn't work then we say no fruit (or whatever dessert is) until they eat 2 bites of the unwanted food. That usually does the trick. Also, we keep serving the healthy foods even if the child doesn't like it. We don't say "oh, the little one doesn't like broccoli so don't bother giving her any." Our taste buds change over time so eventually they should get used to the taste and at the very least tolerate the food, even if they don't thoroughly enjoy it.
vickers says
I let the kids help me prepare the food