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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Ruth/Salty Mama says
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Ruth/Salty Mama says
I'm just getting to a stage where my 14 month old is expressing preferences for foods. I've been making sure that I still offer what was on the menu for dinner (sometimes still different from what we were eating because if her eating ability). I also aim for at least 1 "different" or unusual food a week that is outside our routine diet (blue potatoes, artichoke), so that she sees a variety of foods before she gets much older.
Melissa M says
like
Melissa M says
My 3 year old can be a fussy eater. I do tell her she has to take a bite and try the food, which she actually does. Also, I make a homemade dressing/dip for her to dip her food into. She dips EVERYTHING!
Francine Westphal says
I finely shred carrots to hide in my homemade spaghetti sauce.
Sarah A says
like
Sarah A says
I would have to agree that a gentle approach that makes the experience fun for the child is best.
Amy McCandless says
"like"
Katie Johnson says
"Like."
Katie Johnson says
I have a 17-month-old and, as much as possible, am already trying to apply the principles of eating together, serving her what we're eating, feeding her real food (thank you for your help and ideas!) and eating only at designated times. It's tough to stick to it, but I sincerely hope it well help shape her perspective on food.
Been intrigued by this book for a long time. Hope I win! :)
Amy McCandless says
I involve my child in the preparation on our meals. She is more willing to try new thing and eat things that she normally wouldn't when she has put time and effort into helping make our meals.
Sashi says
Like :D
Sashi says
When I was growing up, my mom had this rule for foods that my sister and I didn't like: we had to eat 1 piece or 1 bite for each year old we were. For instance, if my mom served spinach when my sister was 5 and I was 12, my sister would have to take 5 bites and I would have to take 12...even if they were small ones. Of course, now we both love spinach. :)
becky says
"Like!"
becky says
Everyone has to try one bite, before they say they don't like it!
Maleah Stroud says
Persistence is key. We ask that the girls take one 'no thank you' bite of new foods or veggies that they don't like. Guess what, eventually they end up liking then.
sarah r. says
my best picky eater tip is to hide veggies in a green smoothie. yum!
Lora Reynolds says
"Like"
Lora Reynolds says
I take my kids with me to The Farmer's Market and have them pick out a new fruit or vegetable to try. My picky daughter usually sticks with fruit but my son will be adventurous at times. I like that they are getting familiar with different types of fruits and veggies (even if they do not eat them). When they have a question about a fruit or veggie I have them ask the people selling the produce.
Noelle says
Definitely have a problem with short order cooking in my home and it drives me crazy! I have to work on this one and really think it could make a huge difference!
Melissa says
My favorite tip is to involve my nieces or nephews in the food prep and encourage them to take a taste test.
Melissa says
It' not taking my "Like".
:-(
Stephanie says
I have a husband and two daughters who are picky eaters. I know I was picky when I was a kid, but I ate fish, all kinds of fruits and vegatables and never had chicken nuggets. I am inspired by your blog/facebook page. If I dont win the book, I will buy it myself. I hope to slowly turn around the eating in my house. Thanks!
Alexis says
like
Alexis says
My kids have to at least try a bite of whatever it is they don't think looks good.
Kim Lucado says
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Kim Lucado says
We have a picky eater and our main strategy is to keep trying and keep presenting healthy foods.
lindsey rose says
'Like'
lindsey rose says
We always encourage the kids to give it a try, and LEAVE it on the plate, even if you don't want to eat it :)
Megan says
Like!
Megan says
No short order cooks! and involve the kids in the process of cooking.
Anna says
like!
Anna says
I teach a pre-k class full of picky eaters. I often try to get them excited when we are going to have a new or different menu item for lunch. I tell them how good the fruits and veggies are for them and always encourage them to at least try a bite of everything. They are always so proud when they accomplish a "happy plate".
Karen says
My kids are older and have never been picky eaters. They have their likes and dislikes, just as adults do. When they were introduced to new foods, we required at least a taste. I counted foods with our youngest----sometimes it would take 15 separate tastes (ie meals) for her to actually take a second taste!
tori says
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tori says
My son is a pretty good eater but as he is getting older he is getting more picky.one rule my husband and I stand by is eating as a family and we all eat the same thing. If hedoesn't like it he has to take at least 2 bites and try it.
Michelle Forgey says
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Vanessa says
Our children eat whatever we are eating since they started solids. I made their baby food so they could discover texture and taste, jar baby food is so bland and refined, even the organic ones. So now if we go to dim sum they want tripe, Vietnamese pho must have tendon, broccolini is the vegetable of choice right now (good for them, not so much for my food budget) and they tried again Brussels sprouts the other night...still not a favourite. Having just returned from Paris, their eating time is about 2 hrs long. The thing with eating over a long period is your stomach starts feeling satisfied and you don't need and can't eat a massive portion like they serve here in the US. When your meal period lasts that long and your stomach feels satisfied you don't feel the need to snack as often also.
Michelle Forgey says
We have been making smoothies with objectionable food in them. The kids like them and once they have said its good we tell them what's in it...they are now all eating raw spinach leaves!
Bobbie says
The French rules could also be called American Farm rules. I would still like to read the book.
Jen says
We do not practice short order cooking in my house. Period. If you don't like it you have to at least try three bites, and you have to try it again next time as well. It's been proven that kids have to try new things several times before they are open to the idea of them. I also take my kids shopping with me. It's so much fun for them to help pick out the fruits and veggies and its a good learning experience for them to figure out how to tell when foods are ripe and good to eat.