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Now I will say, as motivated as I felt after reading the book, there's one huge component we’re lacking here in America. Apparently, in France, their schools, governments, and communities all work “together to create food and education systems that support parents in feeding their children well.” I don’t know about you, but I oftentimes feel like others are working against me (not with me) when it comes to feeding our next generation well. My daughters eat more junk food at school than I would ever dream of giving them at home. I can’t imagine how much easier things would be if everyone in our society was on the same page like they appear to be in France.
But rather than waiting around for that to happen we must just take matters into our own hands. And what I have learned from my own children is that converting a picky eater requires a gentle, yet persistent approach and LOTS of patience! Winning over a picky eater is not something that will happen overnight, but if you really make it a priority in weeks, months, or even a year I guarantee you will start to see some of the dramatic changes you are hoping for. And in the end it will of course be worth the effort.
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10 great takeaways (the “French Food Rules”) from the book French Kids Eat Everything:
- Parents: You are in charge of your children’s food education.
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Apparently the French think us Americans cram our schedules so full with activities (like sports, art, music, dance, etc.) that it leaves little time to teach our children "some of the most basic, important things they need to know, like the proper way to prepare, cook, and eat healthy food." You have to admit it's hard to argue with that criticism. And I just love the analogy the author uses when she says, "French parents think about healthy eating habits the way we think about toilet training, or reading." If your child had trouble learning to read or using the potty would you just give up? Same should go for eating a variety of healthy foods...I know, they are right and it stings.
- - Avoid emotional eating. Food is not a pacifier, a distraction, a toy, a bribe, a reward, or a substitute for discipline.
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I feel like we are so far down this rabbit hole it might be hard to get out, but let’s face it they have a good point here! Food is for nourishment, hunger, and nutrition...not for being a good listener.
- - Parents schedule meals and menus. Kids eat what adults eat: no substitutes and no short-order cooking.
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If this were a reality for everyone it would certainly make life a lot easier!
- - Food is social. Eat family meals together at the table, with no distractions.
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How you eat can be as important as what you eat.
- - Eat vegetables of all colors of the rainbow. Don’t eat the same main dish more than once per week.
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I agree that variety is extremely important, but I am personally a little stumped when it comes to the second half of this rule. We love leftovers at our house and feel they are such a time saver...but that certainly means eating the same main dish more than once, or in some cases, more than twice per week!
- - For picky eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to taste it.
For fussy eaters: You don’t have to like it, but you do have to eat it.
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When considering these statements it's also VERY important to remember that "you're not going to convince the kids to love food by being too strict with them. It has to be enjoyable. Not necessarily loads of fun, but simply pleasurable." This takes us back to that "gentle persistence" I mentioned above.
- - Limit snacks, ideally one per day (two maximum), and not within one hour of meals.
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Now, I know out of all the rules on this list that "no more constant snacking" will likely cause the most uproar. But according to the author it's okay to feel hungry in-between meals and guess what...your kids might eat a better dinner if they are actually hungry!
- - Take your time, for both cooking and eating. Slow food is happy food.
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"North Americans associate food most with health and least with pleasure. The French are at the opposite extreme: they are the most pleasure-oriented and the least health-oriented about food." And ironically enough "20 percent of kids in the United States are obese, but only 3 percent in France." Now if that doesn't send a message, I don't know what does.
- - Eat mostly real, homemade food, and save treats for special occasions. (Hint: Anything processed is not “real” food.)
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See...I am not the only one preaching this statement! :) But "so much of what French people eat is, by default, 'real food'" so I'd have to say they don't exactly face the same challenges we do when it comes to encountering junk food on almost every corner. The French do have an admirable approach though when it comes to the processed, junk food their kids may want to eat on occasion. They do not police their children's food intake (or ban all junk food), but instead attempt to "train their children to eat a balanced diet and to realize how much healthier they feel if they eat mostly 'real food.'" I've always said that if my daughters only avoid processed food "because mommy said so" then it's not going to get us very far.
- - (The Golden Rule) Eating is joyful, not stressful. Treat the food rules as habits or routines rather than strict regulations; it’s fine to relax them once in a while.
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I couldn't agree more with the importance of this rule, but striking the perfect balance between "good nutrition" and "relaxing the rules" is no easy task. And maybe that's because most American children are faced with processed, junk food on a regular basis (at birthday parties, friend's houses, church events, soccer practice, school celebrations, etc.). As I mentioned above, our society is (unfortunately) not exactly working together on these issues like they are in France. Regardless though, I agree it is not "healthy" to constantly be stressed out about the food you eat.
In addition to this list of rules there were so many other startling facts and insightful statements that I took away from this book. I wish I could share them all here, but since that's not a very practical idea I will instead just highly recommend that everyone go out and read the book yourselves! I promise you won't regret it...not to mention there are a handful of kid-friendly recipes in the back.
*THIS CONTEST IS CLOSED*
The winners are:
- Ann - "I abide by the kids eat what adults eat rule and don’t offer other options. We also stick to real foods, minimal sugar. So I think that helps kids eat real food without complaint."
- Emily - "My husband can be a picky eater, so my trick is preparing the same food a number of times. He may not like everything, but perseverance pays off!"
- Nicky - "Rule #6 is the big one in our house….even if you’ve tasted it 50 times, taste it again!"
Tamara Schoolcraft says
FB Like!
Tamara Schoolcraft says
We have a "One Bite" Rule. You don't have to like it, but you must try it. Even if you have tried it before and didn't like you must try it again.
Dawn M says
I am a pre-school teacher and a parent. My rule is everyone has to have a "NO THANK YOU" Bite. They must take one bite and if they don't like it they can say " No Thank You". And most of the time they end up liking it.
Monica D. says
Already "Liked" on Facebook! :)
Monica D. says
We printed out a list of fruits and vegetables from a website. As my boys try each of the items listed they get to check it off. They are really trying to complete the whole list, so they have been willing to try many new fruits and vegetables that they would not have tried in the past!
Casie C. says
liked on FB
Brittany Drabyn says
Like.
Brittany Drabyn says
Give picky eaters a choice. It doesn't necessarily
Have to be two foods they love or hate, but this
Allows them some control in the situation. :)
Jennie says
We use the rule, you must at least try two bites before deciding if you don't like it.
Casie C. says
Best picky eater tip: Put something new in with things you KNOW they like. In our house it's peanut butter. I try to add different fruits or flavors in with peanut butter on bread or tortilla because those are guaranteed to be eaten.
kara says
"like"
kara says
My mom wouldnt let us leave the table till we tried a bite of everything.
Amanda G says
FB "Like" you!
Amanda G says
I can't wait to read this book! Society at times feels like its working against "real food!" Thank goodness for your blog to remind us we are not alone in our real food journey! :-)
Lia says
I put a little bit of what I eat on my son's plate and tell him he has to at least try it.
Lia says
*like*
Shelley S says
I sneak vegetables and other "good for you" foods into things I know my kids will eat. Last night I made a chocolate dip for strawberries out of 2 avocados, some cocoa powder and a few other ingredients. My kids (who wouldn't normally touch an avocado) ate every single bite of it. I will definitely make that again.
Laura B says
Like!
Natalie B says
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Natalie B says
We definitely follow the "you must try everything" rule and I refuse to make "separate" meals or even stop making meals my husband and I enjoy simply because junior doesn't like it. I refuse to cater to the whims of a 9 year old when meal planning. That said he's actually a pretty good eater. He may not eat his meat but he usually eats all of his veggies. No new tips to add here, Just confirmation that some of these rules do work if you are persistent and consistent. :)
Susan says
I do Family Childcare and with my family and the children in my childcare you always take one bite. It usually takes about 15-20 tries to like a food. You may not like it on the first try but you might find out that you really like something the next time you try it.Susan
StephanieW says
We have always implemented the rule "you have to take 2 bites of something whether it is a new food or something you've had before and hated" because we have found that their tastes change. Things they hated before they like now. It has proven to be a very successful rule in our home, as both of my girls love all different kinds of foods including nearly all veggies. :)
StephanieW says
like
Kristie says
picky eaters...you just have to have fresh fruit and vegtables available and cut up at all times, clean and cut up fruits in small bags in refrigerator so it is as easy to grab at chips.
kelly says
Like :)
Cara Vanderstappen says
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Cara Vanderstappen says
The picky eater tips that works for us are: making a list of new foods you have tried (and trying doesn't mean one bite. There is a minimum number of bites required) and it seems like when we skip a snack or dinner gets pushed back later, the picky eaters have no problems polishing off their plates
Cassi says
To get my boys to drink their green smoothies I bought thick colorful milkshake straws. Worked like a charm. :)
Julieanne Miller says
Like you on Facebook!
Julieanne Miller says
My best tip for encouraging children to not be picky eaters is actually two tips that worked really well for our family:
1. When our older babies begin eating new solid foods and we are introducing new tastes and textures to them, make it as fun as possible, and if they don't seem to like it, wait a day and try it again, and again, and again. Sure, there may be a food that a child just really cannot stand at some point in his or her life, but for a parent to say the first time a toddler or older baby tastes ground up meat, "Well, I guess he's going to be a vegetarian!" when he spits out the pureed meat, that is not really giving it a chance! When my girls acted fussy about something new, we just introduced them occasionally, over and over again, over time, and we found that eventually they liked most foods.
2. Really, really limit the snacks! Not even once a day is okay! We provided 3 healthy meals a day, so except when the girls were going through growth spurts, they really didn't need a snack every day. Because snack time was often chopped up fruits or veggies, instead of processed foods, our girls were hungry by the time meals came around, and they never had to be called to the table more than once...they came running - and ate everything that was offered! :)
Angela says
& like, I'm already a FB fan.
Angela says
I took my nephew to a farm camp where he picked vegetables, gathered eggs and helped milk a goat. He was happy to try the foods he picked once we got home.
Stacey says
"Like"
Stacey says
I have 3 kids under the age of 4, so trying to plan healthy kid friendly meals is always on my mind! I've been working on teaching my 3 and 4 year old the food groups (grain, fruit, veggie, dairy, protein). We try to have something on our plate from each group and they think its fun to check and make sure they have an item from each group. It helps if they get to make some of the food themselves, too, then they are more likely to eat it.
Huda says
When ever the kids frown upon a food item i tell them that eatting healthy food is what makes our bodies strong. Recently three people we know have passd away from cancer. The kids had alot of questions about this so i keep telling them healthy foods protect the body from cancer and unhealthy foods feed cancer and other illness.
Emily says
"like"
Emily says
I have found you definitely have to start young in terms of giving your kids a variety of foods. I have also found that if I eat something and talk about it (if I like it) my son is happy to try it. Continually try the food, even if your child says one day they don't like it. Kids are funny they will like something one time and then next not.
paula g says
My husband is the picky eater. Ive tried the you dont have to like it but try it, ive tried the im not a short order cook, i tried being the only one who does grocery shopping.. he will either sneak food (ive found wrappers hidden) or buy fast food. I finally told him youre an adult, feed our son what i make, do what you want for yourself and make sure your sons name is on your life insurance policy. Im not the food police for a grown man.
Christine says
like!
Christine says
My picky eater loves pasta with meat sauce, so I puree up zuchini & spinach with my Vitamix & add it to the sauce. She gets some veggies she would never try & doesn't know she is eating them.